let it leave me like a long breath

frustrated about video games

so i played a bunch of video games as a kid, and i enjoyed some parts and didn't enjoy other parts and that was just kinda how things went. but recently i've been thinking about what aspects of games i actually enjoy to play, and also how i've sunk like thousands of hours into minecraft, not even because i particularly like minecraft but because it's basically the only game that comes close to touching on what i want, and i've kinda come to realize that the kind of games i like are games in a genre that just does not exist? so it's like, wow look at all these video games that are in no way anything that i want to play. look at all of them constantly being churned out and yet i am lucky if i find a single game in a year that actually hits the things i want to experience in a game. (and then usually i can't even play it anyway, b/c the associated console/pc costs are in the hundreds of dollars.)

and so it's like that + this kinda train of thought like "oh actually not only am i not the target audience of Video Games, i never was the target audience for Video Games, and the market is never gonna shift to give me more of what i want". so i guess time to just give up on games forever, etc

you may or may not have noticed that i kept updating the hell game todo list post all week as i finished stuff. this was actually a real help for me, so, now here's this week's todo list, in rough order of importance:

• no more failed map generation (this is an A-level bug, cmon)
  • infinite loop during generation ?? did it ever really exist to begin with?
  • 'no such factory region' failure
  • 'tunneler boxed in' failure
  • 'no path to node x' disjoint map failure
  • actually fix disjoint map generation though
  • at the very least: recognize failed map generation; rerun until generation succeeds
• clean up map data after generation / before gameplay to make savegame serialization easier
• map de/serialization fixed
• pc location / demo shop being placed
• 0.4.0 savegame patching working / version updated
• respawns actually happening, even if jankily
• canvas element correctly sized
• map coords/infobar presenting names instead instead of object labels
• tunnels / stacks not so clogged with encounters
• draw map sprites for throne / grotto / tunnels